Sexual abuse and assault awareness and prevention
A student seems withdrawn after a weekend, then says something that worries you — and you are only in the building for the day.
By the end you can
- Recognize the common forms of sexual abuse and assault of a child, and the myths that hide them
- Notice physical, behavioral and emotional warning signs without trying to investigate
- Respond to a student's disclosure: listen, stay calm, do not promise secrecy, do not question for details
- Report right away: DCP&P at 1-877-652-2873 (911 if danger is immediate), then the principal and EverTeach
- Take prevention steps: professional boundaries, visibility, and reporting concerns about adults
Walkthrough
Know what this course is — and is not
This is EverTeach's own company training for everyone we place in schools: substitutes, paraprofessionals, SPED aides and tutors. It is general information, not legal advice, and it is not a state-issued certificate. It does not replace any training a district or school requires of its own staff or contractors — if a school asks you to complete its course too, do both. The topic is hard. If anything here is upsetting, you can pause and come back; EverTeach support can point you to help.
Why every adult in a school matters
Children who are being abused often tell no one, or tell the first adult who seems safe, in small pieces and sometimes by accident. Adults who work in schools see students every day and are legally and morally positioned to notice. As a substitute you may see a student only once, so you are not expected to know their history. You are expected to notice, to respond calmly, and to pass what you saw or heard to the people whose job it is to act.
What sexual abuse and assault mean
Sexual abuse of a child is any sexual contact or activity with a child, and also non-touching acts: sexual comments or jokes directed at a child, showing a child sexual images or videos, taking or sharing sexual images of a child, exposing oneself, or watching a child in a sexual way. A child cannot consent. Assault is sexual contact without consent, and a student can be assaulted by an adult, an older student or a peer. It can happen at home, at school, online or in the community, and the person responsible is usually someone the child knows and trusts.
Myths that keep abuse hidden
Myth: it is usually a stranger. In most cases it is someone the child knows. Myth: a child who does not resist agreed. Fear, confusion and trust can make a child freeze or go along. Myth: children make these things up. False reports are rare, and a child's account should always be passed on rather than weighed by you. Myth: it only happens to girls, or only to certain families. It happens to children of every gender, age, background and school.
Warning signs — physical
Pain, bruising or bleeding in the private areas; difficulty walking or sitting; torn or stained underclothing; sexually transmitted infections or pregnancy; frequent unexplained stomachaches or headaches. Any one sign can have another cause. You do not diagnose — you notice and, where there is a concern, report.
Warning signs — behavior and emotions
A sudden change in mood, grades or attendance; withdrawal, fear of a particular person or place, or unwillingness to go home; sexual knowledge, words or behavior that does not fit the child's age; sleep problems or nightmares; regression such as bedwetting; self-harm or talk of running away; sudden secrecy about phones or online contact. These signs are a reason to pay attention and to tell the school's counselor or administrator. They are not proof.
Online and peer situations
Abuse and exploitation also happen online: an adult or older person who builds a private relationship, asks for pictures, threatens to share them, or pressures a student to keep a secret. Students may also pass around sexual images of classmates or pressure a peer into sexual contact. Treat these as serious. Do not look at, forward, copy or keep the images yourself — tell the administrator and EverTeach, and let the school handle the device and the images.
If a student tells you
Stay calm and let the student talk; thank them for telling you and say it is not their fault. Do not ask leading or detailed questions, do not try to investigate, do not confront the person they name, and do not contact the family. Never promise to keep it a secret — say you have to tell people whose job is to help. As soon as you can, write down the student's own words, the date and the time. You do not need proof, and you should not wait until you are certain.
Report right away
If you have reasonable cause to believe a child has been abused or assaulted, New Jersey law (N.J.S.A. 9:6-8.10) puts the duty to report on you personally — telling a supervisor does not replace your own report. Call the NJ Division of Child Protection and Permanency (DCP&P) at 1-877-NJ ABUSE (1-877-652-2873), open 24 hours. If a child is in immediate danger, call 911 first. Then tell the school principal or an administrator, and tell EverTeach (973-293-4575) the same day. Do not wait until the end of the assignment.
Take me thereSexual harassment or assault of a student — tell the school too
Possible sexual harassment or assault of a student also has to reach the school's Title IX coordinator or an administrator. EverTeach's rule is the same day, whether you saw it or were told, and whether the student or an adult is involved. This is in addition to the DCP&P report where abuse of a child is suspected. See the course "Harassment and staff–student boundaries" for the Title IX details.
Take me therePrevention starts with your own conduct
Keep every contact with students professional, visible and about school. No private or one-to-one texting, messaging or social-media contact, no gifts to individual students, no rides, and no being alone with a student behind a closed door. Follow the school's rules for one-to-one support. These habits protect students and protect you from misunderstandings.
Prevention also means speaking up about adults
Concerning adult behavior — singling out one student, special favors, private contact, finding reasons to be alone with a student, crossing physical boundaries, or secrecy — should be reported even when you are not sure and even when the adult is well liked. Tell the principal and EverTeach the same day. Reporting a concern is not accusing anyone; deciding what happened is for the school and the authorities.
Do not retaliate, do not gossip
Keep what you saw or heard to the people who need to know: DCP&P, the principal, and EverTeach. Do not discuss it with other staff, parents or on social media, and do not treat the student or the person named differently. EverTeach does not permit retaliation against anyone who reports in good faith.
Scenario 1 — A student says something at lunch
A fifth-grader tells you quietly that an older cousin touches them when they babysit, and asks you not to tell. What do you do? Answer: stay calm, thank them, do not ask for details and do not promise secrecy. Write down their words, call DCP&P at 1-877-652-2873 right away, then tell the principal and EverTeach the same day.
Scenario 2 — A change you notice
A usually cheerful student sits alone, flinches when a particular adult walks by, and asks to stay in your room at dismissal. Nothing has been said. What do you do? Answer: you do not need proof and you should not question the student. Tell the school's counselor or administrator what you saw and heard that day, and let EverTeach know. If you have reasonable cause to believe the student is being abused, you call DCP&P yourself.
Scenario 3 — An image on a phone
A student shows you a classmate's private photo that others are sharing. What do you do? Answer: do not forward, copy or keep it. Tell the student to stop sharing it, take the matter straight to an administrator, and tell EverTeach. The school decides how to handle the device and the images.
Scenario 4 — An adult you like
A popular coach regularly has one student stay after practice alone and texts them. What do you do? Answer: report it the same day to the principal and EverTeach even though you are unsure and the coach is well liked. If you have reasonable cause to believe the student is being abused, call DCP&P too.
Knowledge check 1
True or false: you must be certain abuse happened before you report. Answer: false. Reasonable cause to believe is enough, and finding out what happened is the job of DCP&P and the authorities.
Knowledge check 2
A student discloses abuse and asks you to keep it secret. What do you say? Answer: that you are glad they told you, that it is not their fault, and that you have to tell people whose job is to help. Never promise secrecy.
Knowledge check 3
Who makes the report to DCP&P: you, or your supervisor on your behalf? Answer: you. The duty is personal, so tell the principal and EverTeach as well, but do not rely on them to make the call for you.
Knowledge check 4
Which is the right first call when a child is in immediate danger: DCP&P, the principal, or 911? Answer: 911, then DCP&P, the principal and EverTeach.
Knowledge check 5
A student shows you a sexual image of a classmate. Should you save a copy as evidence? Answer: no. Do not copy, forward or keep it; tell an administrator and EverTeach and let the school handle it.
Acknowledge and mark as done
Marking this lesson done records that you have read it and agree to follow it: you understand the warning signs, you will listen without promising secrecy, you will report suspected abuse or assault to DCP&P (1-877-652-2873) right away, you will tell the principal and EverTeach (973-293-4575) the same day, and you will keep professional boundaries with students. Questions? Ask EverTeach support before your next assignment.
Take me thereWorth knowing
- You do not need proof. Reasonable cause to believe is enough to report.
- Some districts assign their own course on this topic. This lesson does not replace it; complete both.
What goes wrong
- Promising a student you will keep what they told you a secret.
- Questioning the student for details or confronting the adult they name.
- Waiting until the end of the assignment, or leaving the report to a supervisor.